/ HOMEPAGE TEARDOWNS FOR TECHNICAL FOUNDERS

Make the complex
simple.

I roast confusing homepages for technical founders — $249.99, 48 hours, a line-by-line teardown plus a rewritten hero you can ship same day.

/ THE NUMBERS

8+ years turning hard-to-explain things into stories people repeat.

0.0M

Earned media reach

$0.00M

Ad-value equivalent

0

Earned media placements

0K

Newsletter subs

0K+

X followers grown

0K

Day-one signups

/ HACKATHON RECORD

  • 1STETHDenver (solo)
  • 1STETHDenver's Claws Out
  • 1STETHDenver's Claws Out Audience Award
  • 2NDMonad Blitz at Founders Inc (solo)
  • FINALISTYC x402 Agentic Payments Hackathon

/ SELECTED CLIENTS

Trusted by:
AWS logo
OKX logo
NFL Rivals logo
PromptQL logo

/ CLIENTS FEATURED IN

As seen in:
Business Insider logo
Fortune logo
The Verge logo
The Register logo
Inc. logo
homepage_teardown.exe
/ THE $249.99 TEARDOWN

Your homepage
made me cry.

Not in a good way. I read it three times and I still can't tell what you do, who it's for, or why I should care — and I'm the guy who explains hard things for a living. Here's the deal: send me your URL. Within 48 hours, you get a brutally honest, line-by-line teardown of your messaging — what's confusing, where visitors bounce, the jargon that's quietly killing you — plus a rewritten hero section you can ship the same day.

  • Line-by-line teardown of your homepage (or launch page / pitch deck)
  • The 3 messaging mistakes costing you customers
  • A rewritten hero + subhead, ready to paste
  • Delivered in 48 hours

$249.99, one time. If it doesn't make you wince at least once, you don't pay.

/ HOW IT WORKS
01

You send the URL

02

I tear it apart in 48 hours

03

You ship the rewrite

/ ONGOING

Loved the roast?
Here's ongoing.

Here's what ongoing looks like once the teardown lands.
Clear scope. No guesswork.

The Narrative Foundation

For teams whose product is harder to explain than it should be

Turn technical complexity into a clear, defensible company story that customers, investors, and media can repeat.

  • Leadership interviews + audit
  • Positioning + message house
  • 90-day visibility roadmap

$2,500/month

or $25,000/year · 2 months free

Fractional Head of Narrative

For companies ready for senior communications leadership

An ongoing strategic partner keeping product, marketing, partnerships, and executive visibility coherent.

  • Weekly leadership strategy
  • Thought leadership + ghostwriting
  • Monthly plan + metrics review

$8,000/month

or $80,000/year · 2 months free

readme.txt — Notepad

/ A NOTE FROM DREW

Simple is the
hard part.

Anyone can add complexity; the real work is cutting through it until only what matters is left. Bring me the knot and we'll find the thread.

More about me

Whatever you're explaining is probably simpler than it looks.

Let's make it
make sense.

$249.99 · 48-hour turnaround · you don't pay if it doesn't make you wince.